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I'm not a critic. I like most
movies I see because I TRY To see where the writer or the
director was trying to go with it. Most times when I don't
like a movie, it's just because I wasn't smart enough to understand
it. There are usually 4 ways most people recommend you see
a movie. Only my FAVORITE MOVIES
Will even come CLOSE to Ten. The ways people say to see a
movie are as such.... 1. See it Now! or better yet, SHOULD
HAVE seen it right away. (theater), 2.Rent it when you see
it available because it's actually damn good and worth your
late charge at blockbuster (Rent It), 3. Watchable when it's
on TBS/TNT/USA (TV) but not really worth cash, and 4. Don't
waste your money or a lazy sunday to see it (U suck). Read
on. Remember, I'm an idiot.
May 2004:
The Fighting Temptations
[] 5.1 [] TV
I normally like Cuba Gooding in even the most asanine roles,
(lightning Jack anyone?). But for some reason this movie tanks.
It's full of more pop stars than actual Actors. Beyonce is
hot as usual, but there's not a good storyline, the acting
reminds me of a school play. I would only recommend this movie
to someone who's REALLY bored and need to watch something
while they're stuck at home taking oxycontin..
Matchstick
Men [] 6.8 [] TV
Sometimes Nicholas Cage does something odd and quirky that
I think just rocks. Then he does something like this that's
odd and not really that interesting. I admit that there's
some good plot twists in there and the comera work is good
enough to keep you watching, but this movie just didn't do
it for me. To be fair I was recovering from Knee surgery during
this one as well.
Insomnia
[] 7.4 [] Rent It
Al Pacino plays a master of reading the personality and lies
of a person. Supposedly a really smart character and all out
Brilliant Detective. Then he talks to Robin Williams Character
and just gets verbally abused by him. I just kept waiting
for DeNiro to go off and break apart all his little speeches.
Never happened, I guess I should've just accepted that he
was sleepy and couldn't do it. It just bothered me that even
someone as stupid as me could see the logic problems with
Robin Williams little arguments. But still a good detective
movie. I'll probably keep it.
Training Day
[] 6.7 [] TV
Denzel Carries this movie. The writing isn't that great. It's
almost a bad news bears version of Colors meets Naughty Cop.
There was ONE scene that I really couldn't swallow and there
was no real reason for it. Things like that sometimes just
ruin a whole flick for me. Most times I let it go. Denzel
is the only reason to watch this. And trying to figure out
WHY he's acting so crazy is kind of a fun part too. Still
think it could have been more of a back story.
A.I. []
6.9 [] TV
There are a few things about this flick that just REALLY confused
me. I'm not sure where the director wanted to go with this,
but he seemed to change his mind about 6 times. I wasn't sure
if it was the pinnochio thing, the cruelty of humanity, the
family loss, the faith of machines or the greed of man. I
couldn't tell if the ending was happy or sad. I thought it
was depressing. Though, I have to admit, that's one of the
tings I liked about it. You'll have to make your own call
on this. I'm confused.
April 2004:
Dark City [] 7.0 [] Rent
It
I had NEVER heard of this movie before Abby mentioned it.
Thanks to her offbeat sense I watched this movie and realized
some things from this movie were stolen and re-incorporated
into some of my favorite movies. This movie came out YEARS
before the Matrix and WAY before the truman show. Yet BOTH
seemed to be BASED on ideas from this movie. If you ever get
a chance.. rent this movie and accept the blade runner like
quality.
25th Hour
[] 8.1 [] Rent It
There are some GREAT speeches in this movie. Some movies are
action based, some are story based, some rely on the dialogue.
The really great movies can incorporate all those types and
more into a seamless escape from reality. This one is Dialogue
based. The conversations in this flick are real and surreal
They're fantasy and hard reality. I enjoyed the diatribes
people go off in this one.
Kill Bill
[] 8.8 [] Theater
This was one of those movies I heard about coming down the
pipeline. I know what it was based on and who the inspirations
for it were, and it sounded REALLY cool. Then it hit the theaters..
and nobody wanted to see it with me. didn't want to watch
it alone.. so I never saw it in theater. I saw the DVD on
Saturday and was really entertained. Probably not the best
tarantino movie I've seen, but the story and anime influences
made it really freaking cool. I think watching this movie
would be a good way to spend a couple hours. It rawked
Identity
[] 6.8 [] Rent It
I like when movies push you down a path and you can feel the
hand in your back trying to fight the answer your brain is
giving you.. then completely takes a different turn. I suggest
watching this movie for the first 87 minutes. That's to say,
i don't REALLY like the ending. It wasn't bad, just kinda
soft. I really like the shift this movie makes. I just wanted
it to end with a good mindfuck. Watch it next time you get
bored. Not as good as fight club, not as stupid as Dreamcatcher.
(a movie I couldn't make it through due to it's sheer dumbassery)
March 2004:
Boat Trip [] 5.2 [] TV
A movie starring Cuba Gooding and Horatio Sans about 2 guys
who accidentally get put on a gay cruise. Sounds very... well,
gay. This movie is NOT for women to watch. There are almost
as many boobies in this movie as Van Wilder and Nerds. ok..
maybe not nerds. But it's party enjoyable. There are actually
some funny moments and I didn't realize until about halfway
thru the movie that it's basically a remake of Marilyn Monroe's
'Some Like it Hot' . If you feel like watching something ACTUALLY
funny, go rent THAT classic. Boat trip has it's moments. But
since it's a remake. There's no original thought. For men
mostly.
MEMENTO
[] 8.9 [] Theater
This movie starts at the end. I read about this flick when
it FIRST came out and REALLY wanted to watch it. I FINALLY
got to see it. It did NOT let me down. This is probably one
of the cooler more inventive movies I've seen since pulp fiction.
The acting is funny, strange and confusing. Since it runs
backwards, the only mystery is how it all gets started. Really
kinda threw me, and that doesn't happen often. Strange thing
is, when it's obvious, I never see it coming. But this wasn't..
and I liked it. It's not in theaters anymore, but I think
you should sign on to netflix, go to Blockbuster, or rob your
friends collection and watch this really cool movie.
THE HULK
[] 4.1 [] TV
I have no idea who wrote this storyboards or better yet, the
screenplay for this movie but the real culprits of making
this a bad movie is the marketing team. In the previews they
played hard rock music, showed high intense action sequences
and showed the Hulk being Strong and Scary. When you watch
the movie, there's nothing happening but the original story
of Mr. Incredible Hulk. Although a good story... the details
of his existence are POUNDED into your brain. OK, his dad
was crazy.. he injected himself (like all good scientists
do), he experimented on his son..(again like all good scientists),
we get it. Where's the hulk? Is he gonna hulk out? Hulk On?
The BEST part of this movie was the comic book editing. Really
fun to see the scene changes. But.. that's.... it. ... sorry
THE LIFE OF
DAVID GALE [] 7.9 [] Rent It
Kevin Spacey always plays a 'troubled' person. He's damn good
at it. This movie is actually very compelling. When you get
into it, you immediately start to wonder where it's going.
You WANT to know what's going to happen next. The writing
is so well done that you hang on every word in each scene
because you're TRYING to pick something up that you're missing.
I like movies like that. The characters are easy to care about.
Kevin Spacey brings a humanity I don't think anyone else could
have brought to the role. And as a brooding brillaint professor,
he kicks ass. Though I must admit my favorite role of Kevin
Spacey leaves me at a close race between Seven and American
Beauty. David Gale is definitely worth watching at least once.
FRAILTY []
7 .5 [] Rent It
I had NEVER heard of this movie. It stars Mathew McConaughey
and Bill Paxton in a strange storyline. I'd have to say one
of the strangest I've ever heard of. I would LIKE to tell
you more about it, but I'd give the whole thing away. It's
a great strange ummm... thriller/suspense/mindfuck kind of
movie. If you ever see it for rent or someone asks if you
want to watch it.. say YES. I thought it was REALLY cool when
it was shown to me. I'm surprised I'd never heard of it before.
DICKIE ROBERTS:
FORMER CHILD STAR [] 4.8 [] TV
David Spade is only funny when he rips on someone. It's being
a smartass at it's best. Wish I could say you could carry
a movie on it... I can't. It wasn't a BAD movie. It was funny
sometimes. It was predictable and most of the time it was
pepper jack and Cheddar. Just a bit cheesy if ya know what
I mean.
LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY
GENTLEMEN [] 6.8 [] TV
This is a movie for literary geeks and readers of big fat
books that we all hated in high school and Junior High. The
writer of this movie (based on a comic book) had read and
re-read EVERY dusty book on the shelf. There are characters
from '20,000 Leagues under the Sea', 'Moby Dick', 'Dorian
Gray', 'Tom Saywer', 'Allan Quartermain Adventures', 'Dracula'
, 'Sherlock Holmes' , 'Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde', 'The Invisible
Man' and more than I've ever read I'm sure. If you've EVER
glanced thru these works of literary history, you'll REaLLY
enjoy this movie. If you haven't.. well, then you might be
bored with the obscure references. There are a ton of things
in there that I'm sure I missed. The action is cool. THe storyline
is strange but very good. I liked it, but then, I'm one of
the few that liked Daredevil because I read the comic book.
heh.
SECOND HAND
LIONS [] 8.5 [] Theater
WAAAY better than I thought. I was picturing a male version
of Steel Magnolias or some deep meaning crap like that. I
was WRONG. This movie started off cool. Ran smoothly and kept
me genuinely interesting in the old guys it's based on. There
are great lines and quotes to take from this movie. This movie
adjusted my outlook on life slightly. It's hard to do that
with someone as pigheaded and stupid as me. But I REALLY thought
it was cool as hell. If you're at the video store and not
sure what to get. Pick this up. Make some popcorn or bust
some doritos, anc check this one out. It's really worth the
money.
50 FIRST DATES
[] 6.6 [] TV
Adam Sandler, Drew Barrymore... it's umm.. Cute. Nothing REALLY
funny. Most funny moments were because of Rob Schneider. Even
though he plays a stereotype that's so over the top, it's
hard to be offended by it, I still laughed at his character
the most.
BOONDOCK SAINTS
[] 8.4 [] Theater
Killers, guns, irish and fun. Another cool obscure movie that
deserves your saturday afternoon attention. This could really
change your outlook on religion. Didn't work with me, but
this was a FUN intense movie. The action scenes and plot twists
were great fun as well. I WISH I had seen this in the theater.
ROAD TO PERDITION
[] 8.1 [] Rent It
This movie is a moving postcard. If you are a fan of HUGE
beautiful sets, you will LOVE this movie. The story is good
but does Tom Hanks HAVE to take 25 minutes to get thru an
emotion? Don't get me wrong, it's a good movie. Much better
than that movie Hanks was in with Wilson. Probably one of
the most stylized comic book movies I've seen since Unbreakable.
But if you made me choose. Unbreakable rules kicks it's ass
anyday. I must admit that I like Tommy as a bad guy cold blooded
killer for once. It's a nice change of pace.
February 2004
RADIO [] 8.7 [] Theater
One of those movies that makes you believe in the 'human spirit'.
Ok, I really have no idea what that means. heh. HOWEVER, Cuba
kicks major ass. I don't hand out awards or anything but he
does a job like no other in this movie. This is my favorite
cuba role since Jerry Mcguire. If you're apt to cry at movies,
don't see this. If you're like me and expect that tearjerker
shit. You'll be fine. You should watch this movie at least
once. The real life stuff is good sometimes.
January 2004:
BIG FISH [] 7.7 [] Rent It
Quirky, Odd and pretty funny. You have to sell yourself into
the story. I can understand people with no imagination sitting
there going. "this is just stupid". Well, sometimes,
but that's the beauty. The fantasy is the best part of the
movie. It all depends where you'll let yourself fall into.
RETURN OF THE
KING [] 9.8 [] Theater
One of the BEST movies I've EVER seen. Acting was REALLY good.
The storyline moved at a good pace. They managed to cover
all the plot lines and give a GOOD ending. And the HEROS were
great. All good movies have the heros that actually make you
CARE about them. Mix that in with a bed-soaking battle, and
this was a GREAT movie. It has just made my top ten list of
all time.
HOLES []
4.3 [] TV
Are you SURE this is a disney movie? Theres a strange waiting
to this WHOLE movie and you have no idea what it is your waiting
for. Just when things look like they're turning around...
nothing happens. You have to sit thru this whole flick to
get some kind of resolution. It's a bit of a stretch when
you finally DO get to the end. They tie it with history and
curses and make it a little 'magical'. Mostly I sat thru the
movie going... ok.. ummm... yeah... ummmm..... aahhhhh...
finally.
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